Part 4: Consent vs. Non-Consent

In this continuing series, guest blogger Toria helps us consider rape culture and how better to “do justice” for women. Warning: Some explicit images ahead.

• A rape doesn’t suddenly become consensual sex if the victim has an orgasm. A lot of people say that if the victim has an orgasm, she must have enjoyed it. The truth is that an orgasm is the result of physical stimulation, not necessarily from pleasurable contact. A person can have an orgasm whether they want to or not under some circumstances. An involuntary bodily reaction does not constitute consent.
•  You cannot buy a person’s consent. For example, in the movie Easy A, a teenage girl named Olive gains a reputation for pretending to sleep with her male classmates so that their reputations will get a boost; in return, they secretly give her money or gift cards. One boy, after going on a date with her and paying her, forcefully kisses Olive and keeps trying to kiss her after she pushes him away and tells him to stop. He gets angry, saying that he paid her, so where is she going? This kind of logic is used by a lot of johns (i.e. people who go to sex workers) who abuse, assault and rape sex workers for not consenting to doing certain acts with them. Sex workers can be assaulted and raped just like anyone else; paying someone for sex doesn’t excuse someone from ignoring the words “no” or “stop.”

 Note from SG: Check out this Barna research on what Americans believe constitutes sexual harassment.